The Surprising Uses of Dating Advice – Part 2

Two freshman roommates are about to have a conflict of epic proportions. Accusations are flying. The Roommate Agreement has been ripped to shreds, and the previous comfortable coexistence has been replaced with all-out aggression.

The Tip: When you feel an argument starting, ask yourself and your partner, “Have we eaten? Have we had enough water? Have we gotten enough sleep?”

Why It Works: In any kind of relationship, there will inevitably be conflict. This conflict can be a healthy, normal part of understanding the boundaries and nuances of the relationship with that particular person. And sometimes this conflict can bubble up into an argument that neither party really wants to have. If you step into the fray and ask both parties about their current state, you might find that this argument is as much as both people being hangry as it is about the missing Guardians of the Galaxy DVD. Sometimes people misplace their frustration about something else (a bad test, a late night of homework, stress from home) into the current context and presto! Instant argument. If you feel the tension building to a disagreement and you suspect that either side isn’t really mad about the issue at hand, take a time out and assess each person’s general wellbeing. You might find you just need some trail mix, not a fist fight. I get it: we all want to have a “BE QUIET TIFFANY!” moment a la Tyra from time to time, but those moments will be so much more effective if you’re not doing it fifteen minutes before dinner every day.

Previous Article: The Suprising Uses of Dating Advice – Part 1

Next Article: The Surprising Uses of Dating Advice – Part 3

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Ethan Johnson is a Residential Learning Coordinator at Valparaiso University in northwest Indiana. He is a mighty stalk of majestic Midwestern corn. When he is not helping students or catching bats in his building, you can find him reading, watching Grace & Frankie, or tweeting at @ethantjohnson.

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